Joan K.: Is this cool or what?
[showing her iguana skin peel collection]
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Joan K.: Now what other iguana mommy do you know that cleans the butt of their iguana?
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Joan K.: It's been said that iguanas carry salmonella. Yeah, really. Now, it's my contention that Xander does not have it because I've been scratched, and you get it sort of like chickens do if you're not clean, you know, if you're handling their feces - which I do! All the time, you know!
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Joan K.: I only like vegetarian lizards in terms of what I want to own as a pet owner because I like to get very physical with my animals, and I can't see kissing an animal whose got a mouse tail hanging out of its mouth - I'm not a vegetarian, but when they eat fruits and vegetables I feel more like I can kiss them and love them and hold them.
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Joan K.: [as Xander licks her] What kind of mommy am I? I'm a tease, huh? Am I a tease? Yes! You wanna give me another kiss? Yes! Thank you!
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Joan K.: [explaining Xander's head-bob] It means: "Here I am! I'm displaying. I'm happy. I'm not happy." It can mean all those things.
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