John Herod: I said, are you still fast?
Cort: Faster than you.
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Kid: Is it possible? Is it possible to improve on _perfection_?
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Cort: There's a click before the strike. Listen to the clock.
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John Herod: You're not fast enough for me!
Ellen: Today I am.
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Kid: [after being shot by John Herod] Damn, that's fast!
[Falls and dies]
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Scars: I need a woman.
Ellen: You need a bath.
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Ellen: [female gunslinger walks up behind a preoccupied bartender] How about a room?
Horace: Whores next door.
Ellen: [carefully sets her cigar down] Say that again.
Horace: I said whores next door.
Ellen: [kicks the stool out from under him, catches his liquor bottle as he falls, & pours herself a drink] Now, do you have a room available?
Horace: Uh, room and bath, yes, ma'am, coming up!
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Ace Hanlon: You wanna play poker with me, little lady?
Ellen: Looks like you're having a pretty good time playing with yourself.
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Kid: I'm so damned fast I can wake up at the crack of dawn, rob two banks, a train and a stage coach, shoot the tail feathers off a duck's ass at 300 feet, and still be back in bed before you wake up next to me.
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Cort: Last night, The Kid. Tonight, Herod. You're a busy woman. Any man in this town you're not interested in?
Ellen: Yeah. You.
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John Herod: [shouting] This is my town! If you live to see the dawn, it's because I allow it. I'm in charge of everything! I decide who lives or who dies!
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Ellen: I'm gonna kill you if I have to ride all the way to hell to do it.
John Herod: Do you have some particular problem with me?
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Kid: I'm worth $3,000 in four states. Seventy-five offenses and no convictions. My name's Fee but, uh... everyone calls me the Kid.
Ellen: Congratulations.
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Townsman: We're gonna have to bury this old man deep. He stinks something awful.
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Blind Boy: John Herod owns that house. He gets fifty cents of every dollar in this town.
Ellen: What's the town get?
Blind Boy: Huh... they gets to live.
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John Herod: You must be the fastest gun in the west. That or the biggest liar!
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Kid: Want some breakfast? Or, uh, how 'bout a little of what we had last night?
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Scars: You're purty.
Ellen: You're not.
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Cantrell: Sergeant Cantrell.
Shemp: How do you spell that?
Cantrell: Correctly.
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Kid: The Smith and Wesson Schofield .45. Just meat and potatoes. Me and Jesse James think it's the best handgun in the world. Had the trigger guard removed, it saves drawin' time. Don't ever wear it when you're drunk, or you'll kill your feet.
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Kid: Am I fast, or is Sweden just a very small place?
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[Holding a card deck]
Ace Hanlon: This is a very special pack. See, I put an ace in every time I kill a man.
[Shows it and its all aces]
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Ellen: In case you forgot, Preacher, I saved your life last night.
Cort: No, I think you just stretched it out a bit. I might've even gone to heaven if you'd let me die.
Ellen: Sorry.
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[after killing all of Herod's henchmen]
Cort: Sorry, John. Changed the rules. From now on, all the fights are fair.
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John Herod: Like I always say - put a fox in the henhouse and you'll have chicken for dinner every time.
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Kid: No no no no, you see it's a gun fight. We both have guns. We aim, we fire, you die.
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