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[first lines]
Ted Koppafeel: Hello, and welcome to this evening's edition of Fuxxx News Update, right here on the Fuxxx News Channel, America's #1 source for fair, balanced, buck naked hardcore reporting. I'm your host, Ted Koppafeel.
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[last lines]
Ted Koppafeel: That's all we have for tonight folks, and thanks for tuning in. Remember to vote at every chance you get, because it's the only way to keep this country sane. That, and by having lots... and lots... of sex. This is Ted Koppafeel, signing off.
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