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TV Movie 1983 |
Eddie Murphy Delirious
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Eddie Murphy: Now, a brother's dick is too big, so it'll fuck up his balance... Every time you see a brother in a wheelchair, he ain't always crippled.
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Eddie Murphy: Mick Jagger's lips' so big, black people be going, "You got some big-ass lips!"
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Eddie Murphy: [about slavery] The first nigger who tried that shit... Somebody said, "Nigger, bale this cotton" and he said "Fuck you, Massa"...
[sound of a whip]
Eddie Murphy: The other motherfuckers said, "All right, we'll bale the shit, all right. Just keep that fucking shit away from me."
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Eddie Murphy: [Eddie takes the plane south, looking for racism] ... he said "Is this your bag?" I said "Yeah, that's my fucking bag! Why, motherfucker? A black man can't have a suitcase?"
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Eddie Murphy: I been seeing newspapers every Sunday morning, white dudes be in there in their drawers, never having no bulge in they drawers. Smiling at you. If I ain't have no bulge, I wouldn't be smiling!
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Eddie Murphy: I'm winded, I'm out of breath... I'm sweatin' and shit.
Female Crowd Member: You take it off!
Male Crowd Member: SHUT UP, BITCH!
[Eddie and crowd bursts into huge laughter/applause]
Eddie Murphy: Y'all didn't know I was a ventriloquist too!
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Eddie Murphy: Does anyone have a mother that would hit you with a shoe? I had a mother that would throw a shoe at you at the drop of a dime. And fuck you up wherever she was aiming. So by the time I was like ten, my mother was like Clint Eastwood with a shoe...
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Eddie Murphy: I have nightmares about gay people. I have this nightmare that I go to Hollywood, and find out Mr. T is a faggot. Really. And he'd be walking up to people going:
[Mr. T voice]
Eddie Murphy: Hey boy, hey boy! Ya look mighty cute in them jeans. Now come on over here... and fuck me up the ass! C'mon. I'm gonna bend over now. Grrr! Aaahh! Hey, boy, slow down, you're gonna mess around and come too fast. You'll make me get mad and I'll clench up my butt cheeks and rip your dick off!
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Eddie Murphy: My mother ran in the bathroom, see my big brother sitting in the bathroom with a piece of shit in his hand in the tub, I was laying in the bottom of the water with blood gushing out my eye, G.I. Joe up my ass. My mother's like, "What the fuck going on in here?"
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Eddie Murphy: Brothers act like they couldn't have been slaves back 200 years ago. It's like the motherfuckers LIKED that shit. "I whish I was a slave, I would fuck somebody up! Shit, tell ME to bale some motherfucking cotton! I would been on the street and shit, would've come up and say, "Ay, yo, nigger, bale this cotton!" I would say, "Suck my DICK, massa!""
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Eddie Murphy: Bear and a rabbit were taking a shit in the woods. And the bear turns to the rabbit and says, "Excuse me, do you have problems with shit sticking to your fur?" And the rabbit says, "No." So the bear wiped his ass with the rabbit.
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Amazon.com
Light years before political correctness--1983 to be exact--or his comeback in tame Disney comedies, Eddie Murphy was a charismatic, wonderfully offensive, egocentric 22-year-old black comedian known for crude celebrity impersonations and often shockingly frank diatribes on racial and sexual politics. Dressed in a skin-tight red leather suit and delivering endless streams of obscenities faster than Richard Pryor ever did, Murphy is captured in this raunchy HBO special (a filmed document of his Grammy-winning album, Eddie Murphy, Comedian) at his confident, swaggering, comedic peak--a posture that soon disappeared after a string of bland Hollywood comedies. Here, however, his energy and sheer virtuosity command complete control over the audience for 107 minutes, whether he's mocking personalities like Elvis, James Brown, and Stevie Wonder, or spinning long, gag-filled personal anecdotes about the ice-cream man or dysfunctional family barbecues. There's no apologizing for the immature stereotyping, blatant homophobia, and sexism (though Murphy did so several years later) that surface during the routine. But, then again, unlike his much nastier, one-sided concert film, Raw, no topic here is safe from Murphy's uproarious tongue-lashings--including the comedian himself. --Dave McCoy
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