Movie  2003
Daddy Day Care      Back      Home
Jamie's Mom: Who are you going to call if there's any problem?
[gives her a phone]
Jamie: 911, Mommy.
Jamie's Mom: Oh, such a good girl!
Charlie Hinton: Hey, man, how did it go in there?
Max: ...I missed.
Charlie Hinton: He heh... what does that mean?
Max: I missed!
Charlie Hinton: Oh, hell, no!
Charlie Hinton: Wow, goats really love pie

Kelli: Hi, are you the new daddy?
Marvin: I'm your daddy.
[wheeze]
Marvin: I'm not your daddy! I'm your baby's daddy! Er - I'm not your *baby's* daddy! I'm gonna be... I mean, I'm-a... I'm-a... I'm...
Phil: You're Marvin...
Marvin: ...Marvin.
Ben: Remember when you broke my yo-yo?
Charlie Hinton: I did not break your yo-yo.
Ben: You did!
Charlie Hinton: I did not break your yo-yo.
Ben: Yes, you did!
Charlie Hinton: Your yo-yo was broke.
Ben: Yes, you did! Yes, you did! Admit-admit it! Ya killin me! Ya really killin me!
Charlie Hinton: If you don't stop it with that Star Trek stuff, I'm gonna push you in that sticker bush.
Mr. Carrott: B-R-O-C-C-O-L-I! I am the broccoli and don't know why! C-A-R-R-O AND A T! Carrots are healthy for you and me!
Crispin: [shouts] Shut-up, Butthead!
Charlie Hinton: Shut-up, Butthead? I'm sure your mommy and daddy don't like you talking like that. When your mommy comes to get you I'm going to tell her what you said.
[Crispin kicks Charlies shin]
Charlie Hinton: [yells] Owww!
Phil: [in the carrot suit] Nobody likes broccoli!
Charlie Hinton: [in the broccoli suit] Ben likes broccoli! Don't you, Ben?
Ben: Nope.
Charlie Hinton: You turned my own sprout against me? Now you're gonna die!
The Flash: We need more chasing bad guys!
Marvin: Hey, that's an excellent idea!
The Flash: Like the Joker!
Marvin: No, you see, buddy, that's Batman's bad guy. You're the Flash, you need to be fighting...
The Flash: Lex Luthor?
Marvin: No, that's Superman. You need to be fighting Captain Boomerang, Gorilla Grod, the Reverse Flash...
The Flash: How about the Riddler?
Marvin: [to Charlie and Phil] What are you doing to these kids?
Charlie Hinton: Ok, you're gonna go out straight for a pass, and I want you to be my blocker. You're gonna come across and cut left and I'll...
Max: How 'bout we just run in a circle?
Charlie Hinton: ...Yeah, OK, that's a better idea! How 'bout we just aaaall run in a circle?
Mrs. Gwyneth Harridan: My dear Jennifer... In life, there are winners and there are losers; and to win, you have to play dirty!
Mrs. Gwyneth Harridan: Rock for Daddy Day Care... Do you know what this means?
Jenny: A... chance to prove ourselves in a little healthy competition?
Mrs. Gwyneth Harridan: No, you bubble-headed idiot. It's a deathwish.
Charlie Hinton: [after Crispin had kicked Charlie in the shin] I'll see you tomorrow Crispin. Tomorrow!
Charlie Hinton: So... what else can we learn about?
Jamie: Dolphins. Dolphins are good.
Max: Dolphins are fish!
Becca: No, they're not!
Max: Yeah-huh, they live in water!
Becca: That doesn't mean they're fish!
Charlie Hinton: Hey, hey, hey... Calm down now. Maybe we should just ask another question here.
Jamie: ...Where do babies come from?
Charlie Hinton: Eh, eh... Y'know, why don't we go back to the dolphins, or something other than *that*?
Becca: We need more learning about things!
Charlie Hinton: More learning about things?
Becca: Yes. We're at a very critical age. You have to feed our minds!
Charlie Hinton: Today we need some organization and planned activities.
Phil: No. We need Ritalin and leashes, that's what we need.
Amazon.com
There are some good laughs to be found in Daddy Day Care, especially if you're a preschooler with energy to burn. This romper-room comedy shamelessly exploits its high concept idea--dropping Eddie Murphy into a seething den of rugrats--but kids will have plenty of vicarious fun as Murphy and his fellow laid-off colleague (Jeff Garlin) battle unemployment by opening a day-care center in Eddie's home. In partial Witches mode, Anjelica Huston hams it up as a day-care competitor bent on closing Eddie down, while doofus extraordinaire Steve Zahn is recruited as a third partner in "Daddy Day Care," trying his best to entertain a pack of hyperactive kids who've stopped taking their Ritalin. Zahn makes a funny Star Trek fan (even when the script contains bogus Trekkie trivia), and Murphy deserves credit for giving his all in a comedy that mostly squanders his talent. Indeed, is Daddy Day Care a comedy or every parent's nightmare? Daring viewers can decide for themselves. --Jeff Shannon